It is no secret that the Zombie Apocalypse WILL happen. It's just a matter of time, my friends.
I have tried to give you friendly (and hopefully humorous) reminders that well... the zombies are coming. It might happen sooner than you zink, erm, I mean think. And I'm still doing my part to keep you, the general public, informed.
*doodle lee doo, doodle lee doo, doodle lee doo*
"Class, I want to welcome Mrs. Quirky as our Mother Helper for today."
25 kidlets in unison. "Good Morning, Mrs. Quirky."
Quirky waves and smiles. She starts her helping duties.
"Aldo, come here. I need you to count to 100 for me."
"1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, um, um, um."
"11?"
"Oh yeah, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, um, um, um."
"20?"
This went on for every ten numbers. He couldn't remember the transition to 20, 30, 40, etc.
I still give him a big ole' "Great job!" and a knuckle bump.
He liked that.
The knuckle bump made him smile.
So let's fast forward to recess time. Some of the children stayed in to eat their snack if they brought one. The teacher asked me if I could stay in the classroom for a few minutes while she took the other kidlets to the kindergarten playground.
"Sure, no problem."
And that's when the real learning began.
"Mrs. Quirky the other day Ben was playing his bouncy ball and it hit him real hard on the head (points to a spot above his right eye) and I could see his brains!"
"Mrs. Quirky, one time my brain got hurt. I was running down the stairs and tripped. And I think some of my brains spilled out."
"Mrs. Quirky that girl's brain had some blood on it."
Then my son piped in. "Mom! Remember that time when you said if I kept jumping off the fence, my head could split open and my brains might come out?"
"Yes, I do. And it could happen."
All the kids. "Ewww!"
"Kids, you need to take good care of your brains, you never know when a zomb..."
The door swung open and in came the teacher.
"Thank-you Mrs. Quirky, I'm so glad you came in today."
"Not a problem." Quirky said smiling.
"We'll see you in a couple of weeks."
"Oh yes! I'll be here."
I've got more
The seeds have been planted and soon will come time for the harvest!
It's amazing the influence just ONE person can make, especially when the teacher leaves the room.
Don't you worry "My Pretties" and "My Cuties," Mama Quirky won't let you down. I've got my work cut out for me. But I'll be back. Oh yeah. I'll be coming back to...
"Feed your mind!" (A big thanks to Grace Slick for that sound bite.)
Or life will become Zombie Hammer Time lookin' for a bite or two (or three).
"You can't touch this!" (Thanks to MC Hammer for this sound bite.)
*knucklebump*
B.S. No kidlets, zombies, or brainz were harmed during the production of this post. But it's just a matter of time my friends. *brainz*
14 comments:
Quirky you are 'The Zombie Devil' if there is one......
Little impressionable minds....lets hope the parents don't come back with complaints hehhe...till that time
Long Live Zombies
Knucklebump
Quirky, what a great helper you are! You are just the person to eat, er, I mean, shape the young children's minds...lol.nomnomnomnom...(((HUGS)))
The first thing I always ask kids after a bump on the head, "Are your brainz falling out?" Somehow it always makes them laugh and forget their troubles. Little do they know....
*zombie dun dun*
Oh, Quirky, you've gone over to the dark side...and you're looking to take those little minds with you. Shouldn't you wait until they're more developed and mature? (My work here is done.)
This does it. I've been hounding you, Quirks, and you KNOW deep down inside you really need to get back to group. Seriously. Talk to me. I'm here for you. There IS help for someone even as far zombified gone as yourself. But you have to take that first step.
I'll be waiting, praying, The Old Silly
Those silly parents all worried about exposing their kids to Obama - if they only knew what evil already lurks ;-)
@LazyPineapple You have given me the highest compliment I could EVER hope for: The Zombie Devil. Thank-you! *smooch* hee hee
@Collette Well you know the sooner they learn, the better prepared they'll be. *grin*
@Catlady You have given me a challenge. What sound is a zombie dun dun? Hmm. Howzabout *bleh blun* hee hee
@Nomie Gone to the dark side? Hon, I've been a long time resident of "the dark side." You all are supposed to be helping me to get back into the light! Ha!
@YourSponsorMarv The Group. Am I the inspiration for another novel? hee hee
@Em Eggsactly! hee hee hee
Are you just scoping out a feeding ground or what?! Yeah, yeah, a mind is a terrible thing to waste!
Buuwahahahahahaha.
"Kids, you need to take good care of your brains, you never know when a zomb..."
Genius.
Good job! They need to be prepared for ANYTHING......
@MeMe And brainz are a terrible thing to waste too! ha!
@Suldog I have my moments. *grin*
@AmyLK Tis true. You just never know what might happen, eh? *smile*
So, if Zombies feed on brains, then I guess that the best place to hide in case of a Zombie take over would be Capitol Hill, where their food supply would be almost non existent! LOL
Dear Zombiedevil: Grace Slick said to "Feed your head." Just trying to help. You want me to make a fake emergency call to the teacher next time so she gets called out of the room for longer? So you don't have to break the whole "imminent attack of the zombie nation" down into such small increments?
@Otin LOL! So true, so true!
@Kablooey Ooops! You are correct madam! And yes, please make the emergency call. I've got lots of teachin' to do! Behind closed doors. *wink*
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