Kill Joy To The World

Christmas.

I'm sure by the time you read this, the gifts will have been ambushed and the kids will be on their sugar high from one too many candy-canes.

But thank-goodness.

The madness.

It's over.

Now the real fun begins.

Cleaning up.

I'm not talking about the "regular" clean-up.

I'm talking about Mother Earth.

She reeks of pollution within the bowels of her substructure to the far reaching, fragile atmosphere. She reels from this man-made madness. She is writhing in agony as the pin-pricks of unneccessary consumerism rape her worn-out terra firma.

How many trees died to wrap a gift for you on this day?

How much larger did the hole in the ozone increase because you went on excessive shopping trips?

How many more tons of discarded paraphernalia did you throw out to make room for new paraphernalia?

How many more pounds did you add to the all ready obese human population?

Do you realize that your great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, GREAT grandkids will have to clean up YOUR mess?

Yes, "they" won't have any trees to cut down to mush-mash all up and dry into paper so they can wrap a gift. They'll have to use leaves and tree sap (to glue the leaves together) to use as their wrapping paper.

Yes, "they" won't have to worry about the ozone hole because of two things. Automobiles and the ozone will be obsolete. Everybody will be wearing burkas and Ray-Bans to protect themselves from the wicked ultra-violet rays glaring down upon the earth. And, I've heard those burkas can get very hot. So everybody will be stinky from excessive sweating. Don't think there will be anything like deodorant available. That will be long gone. I don't know about you, but I don't wish this upon my posterity.

Yes, "they" will actually enjoy those trash dumps because that's where civilization will be forced to live. Yes, your trash dump will be the new neighborhood. Why? Because "they" will be forced to recycle whatever they can use at the dumps. No trees? Means no new homes being built or renovated. Old printers? They will be the new t.v. trays. Old monitors? They will be the new mirrors albeit only usable during "reflective" moments. Old bicycles? New mode of transportation. Old toothbrushes? They will be your NEW toothbrush. Old baskets? Your new drawers for storage and other whatnot.

Yes, "they" will continue to be obese. Why? They will find all those pictures you threw out because you were mortified at how awful and HUGE you looked and they will mistakenly think, "Bigger is Better." And we all know that ain't true, at least not when it comes to dimples and rolls. So they will scavenge and do everything they can to gain weight. And if they are cursed with the skinny gene, they will wear fat suits under their burkas. The burkas will hide their deception and save them from peer persecution.

Yes, all this because YOU had a great day today.

To all of you greedy, selfish, materialistic, gotta have the latest and greatest, gotta have the plasma tv, gotta have the bestest of the best, gotta have not one but five iPhones, gotta have a MacBook and a PC, and all of you who have plenty of Christmas goodies to consume.

Merry Christmas!

And to the rest of you?

Get with the materialistic program.

"Go eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die..."

Yeah right.

Consumers!





B.S. The true reason for Christmas WAS harmed (and totally obliterated) during the production of this post.

B.B.S. BAH-HUMBUG!

B.B.B.S. Merry Christmas!